Marriage is a beautiful bond but it is difficult too when not handled properly. Always remember a relationship which is not two sided is nothing but a wreck. If you want to have a good relation with your partner after marriage it is utterly important to sit together and discuss over almost everything that is in your mind.
You and your partner must come into terms with each other respectfully before starting a marital life. We have gathered a few points that you could discuss with your partner in case you are not having anything in your mind. Read them and see what else you could ask in your conversation and go for it.
7. Finances
Money is sure a mandatory discussion to be made before going into a marital relationship. It’s certainly not that money will be core to build the relationship but without it nothing could move in a proper way.
Every couple must talk over it very maturely and openly. Most of the people are not comfortable talking over the financial situations, current or former but this has to be understood by them it is a very important topic to be discussed. One should open up to the partner and be transparent about what their prevailing situation regarding finance is.
- It is very important to let the partner to be aware about any debts which are yet to be paid.
- It would be a disaster to put the partner in an illusion that the financial status is perfect even though it is all a mess.
- One must share about the views on taking the financial matters to run the family in future.
- Every financial aspect shall be discussed before stepping into the wed lock.
- Means and ways to save and spend can also discussed along.
No one would ever like to find it difficult in staying financially unstable; hence awareness beforehand would always work to be saved from the surprising troubles.
6. Parents
It’s pretty obvious that every partner wants his/her partner to respect their parents. It shall never be forgotten that how much a person loves his/her soul mate but when it comes to parents, no negotiations work at certain points.
Partners shall explain each other openly about his/her relationship with the parents. He or she must get into notice of their partner that what is expected from them with regards to parents or any other family members.
- It should also be explained to the partner about the personality of every individual of the family. This shall not be kept as a bumper surprise for the partner, who should explore his/her self about any negative traits.
- Not only the negative traits but the positive traits shall also be discussed.
- Aged parents are always not an issue to handle. There are different ways to handle different people and that shall be informed beforehand to partner.
- This awareness of behavior and personalities would be a great help to deal with the coming situations that could be difficult to handle if such information had not been shared.
5. Moving To A New State
This is to be dealt either with pre planned decision of moving to a different state or any situation that would lead to a movement later. If there is to be a planned shifting of states than the two must defiantly be agreed over it. It is always good to tell your partner about the near future plans and make sure that he/she is in consent with that.
Many times it is seen that partners stay reluctant in letting their partners know about how they are planning about things. This, if not 80 % incorrect than at least 75 % is for sure. This is because of the reason that you certainly do not tend to be open with your partner or else you want to be independent in taking the decisions. Even those decisions that might affect both the partners.
- One must keep this in mind that whatever the decision has to be made going on further shall be in the best interest for both the partners.
- Besides, shifting is a whole lot of a big deal so make sure that your partner is supportive in that.
- Let your partner know that any state shifting made shall be considered rather than letting it go.
- Make sure beforehand that your partner will be comfortable with that and know about any conditions that he/she must want to add in this kind of situation.
4. Parenting
The most important discussion between a couple to be married is about kids. This shall be a very important topic of discussion. One should know about the concept of parenting his/her partner pertains in mind. A father should know what his school of thought says about parenting and then shall hear what his partner to be has to say about it. This is to be done vice versa.
It certainly is the responsibilities of parents to up bring their child in the best possible manner. In order to do that parents must always be on the same. Parents differing in their methods of upbringing their child would not only affect the personality of the child but it would somehow bring a negative impact on the relation of the couple as well. This will be because of the reason that continuous difference in opinion of parents will make the child confuse and the parents themselves will be on the points of disagreements with each other very often.
- Prior to the discussion of upbringing the child, it is very important to talk about conceiving.
- It could be a great deal of hassle to cater any unwanted pregnancies and this shall be discussed earlier.
- After getting done with this, than the partners can go about further on the discussions of how the child should be brought up.
- Agreeing on all these points will help make parenting a bit easier. However, the situations would always tell the right behavior to be followed.
3. The Difficult Times
Now look it’s very important to know how your partner takes things and reacts to them. To know this you have to be interrogative with your partner about this. A person who is able to deal with the difficult times gracefully is seriously the one! You must know how your partner has faced his worst challenges in life previously; you must ask him/her the way they have dealt with the tough times in life.
There way of facing the situations or the difficult times can tell you literally every aspect of the person. You have to be concentrating about how he/she had taken on him/herself, weather it had made your partner a bitter person or a better after every downfall. What really made your partner frustrate to the limit or what made your partner lift up again. There are so many questions that you can ask to gauge about the personality and the behavior of the person. All you need to do is listen patiently and be mindful on asking the next question.
- You have all the rights to know what your partner had been in past. And you have all the rights to question about the behaviors that he/she had adopted.
- This is a very good time to observe and check how a person could be in the future after marriage.
- It’s the actions that justify the behavior and not the words. Hence go for that not the sweet words all the time.
2. Priorities
Getting your priorities lined up straight is yet an important task. One must make sure that what are the basic priorities that need to set along with the partner before going on any further.
Priorities have a very broad perspective. They could be in terms of emotions; they could be in terms of work or any other aspect. Each of them shall be discussed prior to starting with a new life. This would help understand the partner better. Knowing what lies very important on your partners life is your responsibility to gauge and if it’s not possible to do so, you must simple ask your partner openly about it. This would be lead to a better decision in many circumstances later. You would know any particular action or decision taken by your partner is actually why.
- You should know about your partners thoughts on buying a home for both of you is on the priority list
- Or is it the yearly trip to the greatest islands around the world to relax and freshen up after the whole tiring year.
- You can also ask about the priorities between any other person and yourself. If you are really that possessive kind of a partner. Just make sure you don’t sound too suffocating over here.
1. Communication
The only thing that can keep the relation build better day by day and with the passage of time is by communication. See, there is nothing as pre understood things in the beginning of any relationship. It’s not easy to understand a person at certain points even after many years. So, an open communication is an ongoing process that will help avoid so many misunderstandings.
It is always better to break the ego and communicate over things before you start creating a big mess inside your head on the basis of assumptions. It’s communication that will help create a better understanding between the couple and let the partners know where to be careful in the next future situations.
- If you expect something from your partner be very vocal about it. Do not keep it inside you thinking that it would be understood on its own.
- No! Nothing in this world is done on its own there are surely efforts needed for that.
- So you need to make those efforts to make your relationship work better.
- Know that your partner could be the one who shall be that one particular person who is open with you about anything. So make that comfort zone for him and never disconnect from communications.
Tips
- You have to be very polite while digging into the past of your partner, you definitely do not want to pick the pieces from the past and hit your partner with that after hearing it.
- Listen to what your partner has to speak about his mind to you
- But do not be afraid to keep your terms and conditions in front of him/her as well.
- Learn to say no where needed.
- This is the best time to know what you’re stepping into.
- Always be honest in sharing your opinion with your partner but flexible to alter your behavior where needed.
